![]() The success of the open-ended compliment involves a trifecta of being direct, intentional, and polite (DIP, if you will). ![]() That screams, “I think you’re hot and I did a cursory once-over of your social media to find something to talk to you about.” Not a good look! Let them know how it is you became a follower-but whatever it is, it can’t be specific to a post from, say, 11 months ago. Maybe it’s their activism work you stumbled across out of mutual interest, maybe it’s the extensive knowledge of marine biology they deliver via scintillating Twitter threads, maybe they’re really good at shooting pool and you tripped across their profile because you love the #pooltrickshots tag. ![]() To avoid sounding random and desperate with someone you don’t know at all, it's helpful to remark on something about them other than their appearance that you find attractive-if you open with “ Hello, beautiful,” I’m here to tell you, you’re getting blocked immediately. Shoot your shot now, so that one day you'll both be able to consummate all the horny, yearning energy into a meaningful connection and a fruitful relationship. It requires taking a deep breath and choosing to be at least somewhat vulnerable-while knowing that if it works, you may be granted access to their undivided attention in a way you might never be able to otherwise. Ergo, reaching out to a crush-whether they're a stranger or someone already in your social orbit (which we'll get to later)-is different than firing off a volley of “u up?” texts and DMs to everyone in your contacts list. You can tell a crush from ordinary horniness because this certain someone has dominated your thoughts for a while now, to the point of impeding on your daily functioning. Now, how you get from point A to point B on this journey requires some thought-and thoughtfulness. The point is: most of us are desperate for something fresh and exciting, and this energy is in your favor, Mr. And in a sea of stuttering Zoom happy hours with bored friends, wouldn't you love to talk to someone novel about novel things completely unrelated to the novel coronavirus? Even hearing about your crush's standard biographical information-like how many sisters she has or the geographical details of the lame suburb he grew up in-sounds absolutely riveting right about now. Particularly if it's from you, who thinks that they're special in some mystical, cosmic way. Why? Because in our shrunken, slightly musty world, there's a strong chance that someone single would welcome a friendly dispatch from someone new. It is, potentially, a great time to shoot your shot. Much like the people who are using this moment to eat better, or to work out regularly, or to pony up for a MasterClass subscription, you too can create your own glimmer of opportunity in this darkened hellscape. The nervous energy that comes with sweating someone is almost welcome, though, when you put it in perspective of gestures broadly to the outside world. Remember all that effort you spent creeping on their social media, running a game plan by your trusted confidants, composing and re-composing your first words, sending that text, and then spiraling into the overwrought aftermath of sending that text. Think about the last time you had it bad for someone-like really bad.
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